Kirk & Spock get “Closer”

This is quite possibly the greatest thing the internet has come up with: Kirk and Spock: Closer (warning: completely NSFW). It’s a fan-made (T. Jonsey & Killa) slash-fiction remix/mashup of Star Trek: OS moving pictures, set to Nine Inch Nails‘ classic pants-creamin’ body-rocker “Closer”. It’s a music video with a silly, yet wholly erotic theme.

This is the culmination of all that is Great and Good about teh Interwebs! Finally, we can unplug our rigs and live wistfully happy, idyllic lives among nature now. It has happened. Utopia can start now k thx. The Interwebs has fulfilled its function. 42 my ass.

link apeshit

National Film Board of Canada: 50 animated shorts – excellent stuff!

Dr. Miracles – short film. Completely juvenile, and hilarious. ER gone badly weird.

This Flash “mind reader” seems spooky at first – until you figure out how it works (but do try it first, following the site’s instructions): Notice that the symbols repeat. Also notice how one number may have different symbols when you repeat the process. Then, notice that you can’t just pick a symbol, you HAVE to do the math. NOW… try this: Do the math for 5 different numbers. Do you see a pattern? They’ll all be the same symbol! So no matter what number you pick, if you do the math and pick the correct symbol, it will ALWAYS be right!

Bizarre fish with human-like teeth caught in Texas lake. (Not just human… British.)

Speaking of which… catfish, um, really get this big?!

Bandai’s hilariously weird “God-Jesus” robot toy from the 1980s.

Experiments in the Revival of Dead Organisms. Fucking creepy. Found via Grey Lodge Podcasting Company’s YouTube link dump.

Mazen Kerboj, musician and artist, blogs from ground zero in Lebanon. Check out his improv piece, Starry Night, during which you can hear bombs and air $raid$ sirens in the background. Beautiful and unsettling, all at once. Read his blog and pass it along. Chilling. I hope that he stays safe. He seems like a good man. He says things like:

“we know you are with us. we know you are seeing us. we know you hear the fucking bombs we are hearing. we know you worry for us. but don’t. because you know we are tough guys. you know that we’ll [survive?] this shit. you know that we survived massacre and we’ll do it again today. you know we’ll see each other soon. keep in touch and stay with us.”

People get ready: all this Middle East violence is giving the End-Timers a serious hard-on for the Rapture. A sicker bunch of fuckwits probably do not exist. Zealots are fools. It is religious zeal that has got the world into the mess that it’s in now. How do you spell worldwide suicide? Z-E-A-L-O-T-R-Y.

Zealots of the world: fuck you. I do hope that you all die the vainglorious deaths that you ridiculous, ignorant fools are all hoping for. So GO APESHIT FOR JESUS/MOSES/MUHAMMED! Kill each other to bloody, pulpy fucking smithereens and let the rest of us get on with our futures!

Henry giving it to Ann

Henry Rollins: A Love Letter To Ann Coulter

“But mostly, Ann, you will shut the fuck up.”


link roundup

Top 10 places to find royalty free, public domain, stock photos

Stephen Hawking in the news: “It is important for the human race to spread out into space for the survival of the species… Life on Earth is at the ever-increasing risk of being wiped out by a disaster, such as sudden global warming, nuclear war, a genetically engineered virus or other dangers we have not yet thought of.” – He’s also working on a children’s book a la Harry Potter, sans magic. Dude!

Footage of meteoroid hitting the moon.

Court orders Bob Taft (Governor- OH) to disclose potentially scandalous records. Corrupt Bob must give up. What a loser.

Aussie lyrebird is like a freaking dictaphone of nature! I’ve heard wild stories about this bird, but hear it imitate – perfectly! – a buzzing chainsaw, and two different camera shutters!

After the Rodney King riots in South Central, the city gave residents a plot of land in good faith. How nice! They’ve since turned it into the largest urban farm in America! Unfortunately, it is at this very moment under corporate and police attack. It seems the land was dubiously sold out from under The People to developers. Shame, shame, shame! This is outrageous, and reeks of the kind of “indian-giving” that white people are most famous for.

Don’t even try to cancel AOL. They’ll just give you the runaround and, erm, ask for your father. WTF.

Sexy ro-bots having sexy sex.

An even weirder video: “dancing” Japanese girls teaching defensive English. I guess. Don’t make fun of them.

EFF‘s The Corruptibles!

The Show with Zefrank is a freaking riot!

You may have a case of the humans!

Three Legged Legs – “Humans!”

A hilarious and depressing short animation about the scourge upon Earth that is humanity.

video mashup

YouTube: 10 Things I Hate About Commandments

Most hilarious mashup i’ve seen in hours!

link roundup

Korea unveil’s world’s 2nd (life-like) android. I had no idea there was another, but there is: it’s Japanese.

Best Buy invaded by faux blueshirts! Hail Eris!

Security guards and managers started talking to each other frantically on their walkie-talkies and headsets. “Thomas Crown Affair! Thomas Crown Affair!,” one employee shouted. They were worried that were using our fake uniforms to stage some type of elaborate heist. “I want every available employee out on the floor RIGHT NOW!”

Student kicked out of private university for – get this – being gay! Honestly, wtf?!

This revolving kitchen is a serious space-saver. How awesome is that?

Superhero underwear fetish spoof! Female superheroes have always been objectified as so much T&A… now male superheroes can be fluffy C&B models!

German superhero Robin Hoods steal gourmet food to give to the poor!

“The Not Your Soldier Project gives youth the tools we need to stop the military invasion of our schools and our communities.”

Creationism dismissed as ‘a kind of paganism’ by Vatican’s astronomer.

Remix My Life in the Bush of Ghosts tracks!

3D pictures of 9/11.

The Skeletor Show. Yup. The Skeletor Show.

Terrorist video game mod is a hoax. Who knew? Anyone with half a brain, that’s who.