Sexuality poll

Just curious. Answers are anonymous, so please be as honest as you can – that’s the entire point of this poll. Take your time; think about your answer. Above all, please know that you are not alone in your answer. In a world of several billion humans, there are probably enough people who honestly feel the same way as you do to fill a bustling metropolis, and probably much more than even that. If it will help you feel more comfortable in being open and honest, i’ll tell you what i answered: 80/20%, skewing straight. Remember: answers are anonymous (but see below).

Describe your sexuality (be honest; poll is anonymous)

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(Full disclosure: i do log IP addresses, just in case of pollspam, though i highly doubt i’d ever figure out what to even do with them.)

Popularity: 4% [?]

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Huge New Album by The Cocker Spaniels Out Very, Very Soon

album cover

Sometimes You've Gotta Fight to Get a Bit of Peace

On July 27, 2010, Hornbuckle Records is releasing Sometimes You’ve Gotta Fight to Get a Bit of Peace, the brand-new, highly anticipated album by Austin, TX one-man indie rock wrecking crew The Cocker Spaniels. Over three years in the making, this new CD, a masterpiece with a whopping 18 songs – each and every one a soon-to-be classic – could well be the one that blasts head Spaniel and master musician Sean Padilla into the stratosphere, alongside such not-dissimilar artists such as TV on the Radio and indie legends Guided By Voices.

A while back, i emailed Sean to ask how his record was coming. I knew he’d been working on it for a long time and was getting anxious to hear it, being a massive fan of his last CD, the brilliantly-titled Withstand the Whatnot. He sent me a slew of tracks to listen to. This was probably a year or more ago, and he’s been tweaking it ever since, including having it professionally mixed and mastered. I have to say, the album in the form that i heard was insanely good. Then several months ago he sent me a new version, which sounded even better. It is unimaginable to me that the final version could improve upon Sean’s already masterful-sounding recordings and great mixes, and yet all indications are that it will in fact be exactly that.

Now you must understand here that The Cocker Spaniels is not Steely Dan. Their albums are not pristine, cold, surgical affairs devoid of soul. Although the sound is always crisp and clear, with everything in its right place spatially and frequency-wise, the heart and soul of this band is decidedly lo-fi. Not lo-fi in the sense that they were recorded on crappy boomboxes, or even four-track cassette recorders. Rather, it’s the DIY spirit of the things that recall the absolute greatest Guided By Voices records such as Bee Thousand or Alien Lanes. When you hear this music, you don’t think of some guys in a basement with a couple of crappy Radio Shack dynamic mics going into a consumer-grade stereo tape deck. What you hear is this: a young man with more talent than you can ever possibly imagine anyone on Earth having, absolutely driven (i mean truly, awesomely hell-bent for leather here) to make some damn incredible, original music, almost entirely by himself, a la early Todd Rundgren, or Stevie Wonder. And that frenetic energy is captured perfectly. No, the sound itself is actually pretty spectacular, especially considering that he did it all on his own in various apartments and spaces, without any sort of budget or outside producers.

If you don’t believe me, go and grab one of the mp3 versions he has up on his site for free. Right now, my personal favorite is a tossup between “The Overeducated Underclass” and “Cousin Ben.” As with almost all of his tunes, they are catchy; nearly overloaded with hooks that keep going for days (earworm alert!), featuring intimate-yet-intensely-fun lyrics straight out of real life and brimming with just the right kind and amount of crazy irony, laugh-out-loud stories, and all the joy, anger, and sadness to be found in the spectrum of the human condition, all performed with a passionate zeal and fluidly-jagged precision that will simply leave you reeling. Listen for some serious Frank Zappa chops in his playing, too. The guy can play circles around just about anyone, on virtually any instrument. (Prince who?) While you’re at it, grab some songs off his last record, since it’s out of print (for now), and a fantastic piece of work in its own right.

And yesterday, he started taking preorders, at a mere $12 a pop (that includes shipping anywhere in the U.S. – overseas orders are also available). Although he’s almost certainly sold enough already, the first 150 orders come with a special handmade “making of” zine which is sure to be a serious collector’s item when this guy hits the Big Leagues, which should happen at some point in the months following the aforementioned 27/07/10 official release date. (So get in on this one and hope for the best, because that one little limited-edition bonus is gonna be worth some serious cash on eBay someday, and you don’t wanna have to mope about how you had the chance to cash in on that but you didn’t take it.) Anyway, even if you aren’t one of the lucky 150, you’re gonna get some seriously amazing independent music out of the deal.

(And for what it’s worth, i hear his cookies are freaking crazy-making.)

Popularity: 3% [?]

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Custom Post Type + Custom Menu

Screen Options tab

Here's where you find the damn thing already.

For those of you WordPress users wondering how to find your Custom Post Types in the Appearance >> Menus page (for your Custom Menus), look no further than your handy Screen Options dropdown panel, up at the top right of the page. No, your other right. Up further. Look – right there! See where my finger is pointing? Where it says “Howdy, [yourname] | Log Out”? Yeah, just below that. No, you’re looking at “Help.” I said it was Screen Options and i MEAN it was Screen Options, goddammit.

Menu options dropdown

Menu page options dropdown

I looked and looked and had a hard time finding these options (ok, actually i found it not long after i started looking, but i figured there’s got to be a whole slew of people out there having a hard time figuring this one out). So now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

(Also note that until we get a decent UI, plugins such as Custom Post Type UI will have to do, unless you just want to code away your evening. Additionally, your theme must support Custom Menus in order to use them.)

Incidentally, if you have no idea what the hell i’m on about, and for some reason refuse to mind your own damn bidness, here’s the deal: In the recent WordPress 3.0 release, users now have the ability to create not only custom navigation menus (those things you click on to get to other areas of the site you’re on), but can also create something called a Custom Post Type. (Oh god i wish i could explain this really well.) Basically, instead of only being able to create blog posts (which are generally chronologically ordered) or generic Pages (which are the same thing, without the emphasis on time), WordPress administrators can also create types of content specifically geared toward a given theme… say, a real estate listing, a movie review, or a section of used musical instruments for sale. This also lets you enable or disable certain options. You know what? You don’t get it, do you? Mind your own beezwax if you’re gonna give me that look. Hey – hey! Why don’t ya try running a WordPress site yourself? Seriously. Give me a breeeeeaaaaaak!

Popularity: 3% [?]

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As Long as There is Death, There is Hope

Happy Deathday, Brother Theodore.

Brother Theodore was imprisoned by Nazis at Dachau. He played chess (a game he excelled at so profoundly that he once beat thirty fucking Stanford professors simultaneously – yes, read that again) with Albert Einstein, who helped him emigrate to the United States, where he would eventually become a cult hero with his uniquely surreal gallows humor and eccentric monologues, along with acting as Gollum in the classic Rankin/Bass animated feature The Hobbit, and in such movies as The Last Unicorn and the Tom Hanks vehicle The ‘Burbs. He was a staple of the late-night talk shows in the 1970s and 1980s. He died nine years ago today.

Popularity: 3% [?]

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I Am Not Kurt Vonnegut But Sometimes I Pretend To Be, or, This Is The Entire Thing So Enjoy It

I’m writing a book about a civilization so advanced that they no longer have disputes. However, they’ve also realized the need for warfare and now get to it every dozen or so years, for no other reason than that it’s jolly good exercise and allows for technological progress.

In the end, they realize that all of their scientific passions were in pursuit of destruction & devastation and the eradication of life, just seconds before blowing up the entire universe.

It’s going to be called either Oblivion Operations Protocol System or Automotivated Warfare: Syndicated Hostility Initiative Tokenization, with the title written out so you see the hidden message that reveals humanity’s final observation.

Popularity: 4% [?]

Posted in creative, uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments